


We will rise when the sun sets

by black_winged_traveller



Category: And I Darken Series - Kiersten White
Genre: Gen, LetCyprianRest2k18, Radu needs a hug, Radu/Cyprian is v heavily implied, and sort of gets one, but i just don't feel justified putting it in the ship tag, cyprian has been putting up w so much, nazira is awesome, this fix happened bc they deserve to be happy gd it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-08
Updated: 2018-04-08
Packaged: 2019-04-20 06:13:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14254713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/black_winged_traveller/pseuds/black_winged_traveller
Summary: After the events of now I rise Radu needs time to think, so he takes a break away from the fast pace (and the general presence of Mehmed) of the capital and goes to inform Fatima of everything that has happened since his and Nazira's departure. Once there, he finds more than he expected, and true happiness finally seems within his grasp.





	We will rise when the sun sets

**Author's Note:**

  * For [gnx (LiesArePartiallyTrue)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LiesArePartiallyTrue/gifts).



> This is a gift for the wonderful gnx who is currently in this hellpit of suffering with me and, let's be honest here, this fandom deserves soft content (any content). This hasn't been beta'd and tbh it could stand a few more rounds of editing if it wasn't for the fact that I've gotten sick of looking at it. Feel free to alert me if you find any mistakes. Hope you enjoy!

Not being able to sleep seemed normal for Radu at this point. It had just gotten worse after Constantinople, to the point where his body found it unnatural to sleep more than a few scarce hours a night. Or it might be due to the burning feeling in his gut that was his constant companion these days. He was, after all, worried about Nazira. Yes, that was all it was. He trusted Cyprian, of course he did, but he didn't know what was happening with them and anyway, it's not like he had any other intangible and complicated feelings towards his situation with the other man. None at all. 

So he got out of bed and went for a walk. He had visited the gardens before, obviously, having that this was his house, even if he only visited it occasionally and seeing how it belonged more to Nazira and Fatima then it did to him. Every time he walked through the gardens he found a new flower or sapling growing there. It was nice, looking for those. Not that he could do it very well in the moonlight, but he enjoyed it nonetheless. 

He must have spent twenty or so minutes wondering the path between the plants and letting his mind wander in the cool night. Eventually even thoughts of Cyprian and the war ran out and were replaced by the soothing sensation of the cool breeze on Radu’s face. He wasn't sure how much time had passed since he had ventured out when fatigue started to lay its claim on him once more, aided further by the tranquil song of crickets and rustling leaves. Turning back towards the house, Radu was surprised to see a faint light streaming out of Fatima’s window. Maybe she was finding it hard to sleep too. 

On his way back Radu found no reason to try to conceal his presence, and so did not expect a shape near the door to flinch when a branch snapped under his foot. Both he and the shape stood still as stone. A thief? No, he wouldn't be waiting outside the door like this. Or maybe he was acting as guard. Oh no. Radu made sure to step as lightly as possible on his way through the flowers. He'd have to apologise for ruining them later. The thief did not seem to notice Radu had circled around him. There was something vaguely familiar about the silhouette of the man, but Radu did not have the time to dwell on that as he was busy tackling him to the ground. 

The both of them rolled a few meters before stopping, Radu the first to recover and promptly using his position on top to pin the other man. He would've tried to punch him, if they hadn’t been in an area where the light from the window gave them some clarity. Because, right there on the ground under him, was Cyprian. He looked exhausted, like he'd been walking on eggshells for weeks. Well. That was probably the case, when Radu thought about it. The thought was immediately followed by quite an impressive amount of guilt. 

“What are you doing here?” it came out colder than intended. Cyprian was looking a little to the left of Radu's face with a sad and tires little smile on his lips. 

“I kept my promise. Nazira is safe, and even reunited with her lover. You're welcome. Now could you let me up?” he said, and it sounded rehearsed and stiff to Radu’s ears as he got to his feet. He hesitated a moment and then outstretched his hand towards the other man, who was still half crouched in the dirt. Cyprian’s gaze quickly shifted from his hand to his eyes before reaching to take it. Radu was not certain what he saw in those gray eyes, but it had seemed important. He felt a flash of hope at the thought that it could have been affection, even after all Radu had done. He snuffed it out immediately. 

“Come, I expect you're exhausted. Let me at least offer you a cup of tea?“ said Radu, and his voice did, thankfully, now waver. 

Cyprian seemed a little startled by the offer for a moment and then nodded his head. He _was_ really tired and a cup of tea _did_ look very appealing to him, so he followed Radu to the kitchen. 

The ambiance was awkward and stiff as Radu got to boiling the water. Both of them had things to say, but no-one wanted to start talking. It was in the new calm and quiet that Radu actually processed what Cyprian had said in the dirt outside. 

“I'm not her lover, you know,” he said in what was almost a whisper. Nevertheless, it felt good to say it, to actually have someone know. And he realised that he wanted _Cyprian_ to know, had wanted that for a while. 

“That is not what I meant.”

Radu stared at him for a few moments, his brow furrowed, and then it all clicked into place. 

“I had had my suspicions for a while, and some of Nazira’s words all but confirmed them,” he added when he had seen that the other man was not faring well with figuring out words. 

“Right,” was all Radu managed for a while, and then, “so what are you going to do now?” he asked because changing the topic was so much easier than actually addressing the heavy, unanswered thing hanging in the air around them like a thick fog. 

“I honestly had not looked that far ahead,” admitted Cyprian, who did find himself a little lost now that his main (and only) objective of getting Nazira back home safely had been fulfilled. He was certain he did not wish to stay in the Ottoman Empire for any longer than strictly necessary. He could always run away to an island but the idea just seemed a bit less inviting when he knew Radu would not be accompanying him there. 

“Well, you could always stay here for as long as you need to figure it out,” said Radu, who was making a great effort to not look at Cyprian, probably to try and hide the blush spreading along his neck and face. He had barely conceived the idea when it was already halfway past his lips, and found himself hoping very badly that Cyprian would take him up on that, was even ready to present some frankly desperate arguments in favour of why it was not actually a horrible idea. Spending time with the other man would be wonderful, and Radu had to admit he felt he had gotten used to living in the same house as him. It felt strange, living with only Fatima, like there was a hole he couldn't quite fill. And besides, he would need some time to get all his thoughts and feeling straightened out after this quite eventful evening. 

Cyprian smiled, and agreed without any garish persuasion methods needing to be involved. 

\---

Things were awkward when the two were around each other for the next two days. Or so it seemed to Radu, who was sort of, maybe, trying to avoid the man he had just realised he was in love with. The realisation had send him spiraling to the point where Nazira had to barge into his room and berate him about how he should actually _talk _to Cyprian instead of letting his mind panic about worst case scenarios. The fact that Nazira actually approved of him (which she went on to say was because she actually had _taste _, if not usually in men) was actually reassuring. She was happy for him now, and got an uncomfortably knowing smile on her face when talking about how Cyprian was sure to return his feelings. Radu chose to ignore all the derogatory comments in regards to Mehmed which she had included, this time not because he disagreed but rather because that would be whole other pile of metaphorical snakes. And he couldn't only deal with only one complicated situation regarding his romantic escapades, thank you very much.____

____So when he entered the kitchen that afternoon Nazira promptly declared she was in the mood for a walk and that it would be so kind of Fatima to accompany her._ _ _ _

____Cyprian did not look all that surprised at his sudden appearance after days of avoidance. Maybe Nazira had something to do with that. Radu would have been exasperated at her meddling if he didn't recognise its occasional virtues._ _ _ _

____It was now just the two of them in the room, Cyprian sitting at the table, visibly fidgeting, and Radu, who was hovering uncertainly by the door. The atmosphere quickly got awkward, dense with all the things they couldn't bring themselves to put into words. So they talked about other things instead, like the weather and the garden outside, pretending just for a while that the situation was not as it was._ _ _ _

____Cyprian seemed the braver one, asking about how Radu was faring now that he was back in the Ottoman Empire, and even congratulating him on his new post in Mehmed’s court with only minimal disdain._ _ _ _

____The silence stretched for a few moments as Radu blushed at the obvious implications, opening and closing his mouth like a fish out of water in his search for anything to say._ _ _ _

____And then all the emotions and unspoken truths that he had pushed down and ignored for years and years spilled past his lips like water from a broken dam._ _ _ _

____How he never really had any friends, how he was always alone even when he had his sister, how Mehmed had been his first genuine friend, how that had turned into his whole world. How Mehmed had used him. Betrayed him. Radu hadn't even realised he had started crying until Cyprian wiped a tear from his cheek. When had he come so close? Numbly, Radu realised he had moved to sit at the table and that he now felt a soft pressure across his shoulders. He closed his eyes and tried to savour this moment of peace and the fresh feeling of a newly unburdened soul. It wasn't like all was well yet, not even close, but Radu felt lighter for having opened his heart of for Cyprian, of finally not having any more secrets from the other man._ _ _ _

____“I'm sorry,” he whispered, not even sure what he was apologising for. Maybe all of it._ _ _ _

____“Me too”_ _ _ _

____\---_ _ _ _

____They stayed like that for a while, just sitting close to one another. It took Fatima peeking through the window opposite them to make them feel slightly awkward. She explained that the kitchen was needed or they'd have to go without supper._ _ _ _

____They hastily departed the space and ended up walking through the gardens, never putting as much distance between them as they had before. It felt like a wall had crumbled between them, no longer plunging them into a silence. They talked about brighter subjects this time. Like their future (and some feelings, but only a few)_ _ _ _

____Five days later Nazira, Fatima, Kumal, and Cyprian departed for a greek Island, which they had heard was a marvelous vacation spot, the latter posing as a new servant employed mainly for making sure their voyage goes safely. Radu would follow soon after, only needing some few days to get his affairs in order in the capital. He worked remarkably fast with a goal in mind._ _ _ _

____Then he too joined his new-found family on an island far away from all their worries. Soon enough he would send a letter to inform the sultan that he had, after some deep reflection, decided that his path in life should be different. Mehmed, at least, seemed to know when a battle was a lost cause._ _ _ _

____As his boat neared the island, clearly seeing Cyprian’s silhouette against the setting sun, Radu finally, for the first time in what felt like his whole life, felt truly happy._ _ _ _


End file.
